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October 20, 2008: Mitch: Senator Obama? Barack Obama: Greetings, citizen! I was just in your neighborhood passing out Kool-Aid and was wondering if anyone had questions for me? Mitch: Okay... uh... how do you plan on making our tax system fairer? Barack Obama: By using a slogan of mine: from each according to his ability, to each according to his need! Mitch: Hmm... sounds familiar. Hasn't that been tried? Barack Obama: Never successfully!
October 22, 2008: Obama Youth 1: You embarrassed Senator Obama. Mitch: Huh? I just asked him a question. Obama Youth 1: One with an unflattering answer to The Obama. It is impermissible for citizens to ask unvetted questions. Mitch: Uh, look... he came up to me-- Obama Youth 1: Talking back, eh? Carl, show Mitch The Worker how we deal with back-talkers. Obama Youth 2 (Carl): Uh-oh! An unpaid late fee for renting "Gigli." I'm emailing the New York Times. Mitch: Wait! I was going through a Jennifer Lopez phase!
October 24, 2008: Media mob: Mitch, have you stopped beating your wife? Mitch: All I did was ask Obama a question. Now the media is tearing me apart! Al: You're doing it wrong. It's easy to make the media go away. Mitch: How?! Al: Mitch would like to have a detailed press conference on topics that people actually care about. Media mob: (runs away) Gotta go!
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