May 14, 2007: TV news: The city is being attacked by a trio of super-villains! Al: Snail-Man to the rescue! Yawn! Dana: Evil's afoot. Wanna speed it up? Al: Hey, I have two-and-a-half hours of movie plot to fill. I'll get there when I get there.
May 16, 2007: Al: I'm Snail-Man, here to save the day! Kepler: Thank heavens you're here! You have to stop the Sandman! Al: Whoa, whoa, whoa... in a movie that's already too long, our super-villain is named after someone who puts you to sleep? Kepler: Never mind that. Can you stop him? Al: Sure. I'll use my snail powers to slow down the plot 'til he's bored to death.
May 18, 2007: Mitch: Snail-Man! The trio of super villains is threatening the city! Al: Mm-hm... that's too bad. Mitch: Aren't you going to stop them? Al: Look, I can't solve all of your problems. I'm using tough love. You'll have to solve some things yourselves. Mitch: Ourselves? But you're the super hero! Al: Okay then... it's super tough love.