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Sunday, August 10, 2008
 
 

 

Take that, Frenchie...

• Today will be another day with a short recap. But boy what a night it was.

• At women's gymnastics, Al Trautwig is doing commentary for the competition. After two American gymnasts had rough floor routines, Al stated that gymnast Nastia Liukin was able to ignore what had happened with the first two gymnasts because she was in "The Liukin Zone." Dee-dah-dee-dum. Dee-dah-dee-dum. Dee-dah-dee-dum. Dee-dah-dee-dum. Submitted for your approval: Four American gymnasts are trying to get a gold medal, but what they actually get might be something quite unexpected in... The Liukin Zone.

• Apparently, in The Liukin Zone, Al Trautwig can only talk in cliches.

• Bob Costas interviews George Bush! To his credit, Bob doesn't just throw up softball questions for the President, asking him about China's oppression, Russia's invasion of Georgia, and steroids in sports. And to Bush's credit, he doesn't dodge the questions. It was actually a really good interview in that Costas asked tough questions, but in a respectful way. Maybe Bob should host the presidential debates this fall.

• The French are smack talking Michael Phelps! Yes, really! French swimmer Alain Bernard claims they are going to "smash" the America team. Ohhh... I've got to see this.

In fact, this has even affected my vacation. Our vacation group wants to see Phelps beat down the French so bad that we're ordering food to the room instead of going out. This is going to be AWESOME!

• That was a heartbreaking loss for American Katie Hoff. As we waited for the Phelps vs. France race to start, we got the undercard race, the women's 400-meter freestyle. Katie Hoff was ahead until... well, it appeared she was ahead until the last inch, when Britain's Rebecca Adlington beat her by seven hundreths of a second. How close is that? Well, if you were watching it on your TV know this: a television has a frame rate of 30 frames per second. Adlington won by two frames, so fast that most people couldn't even notice the difference. Imagine the heartbreak of training for years only to lose a race you had been leading by a mere two television frames. Hoff will be bumping those two frames forward on her Tivo for years.

• In the meantime, let's watch the medal ceremony of Japanese swimmer Kosuke Kitajima. Heeeyyyy! He's singing the Japanese national anthem ("Turning Japanese I think I'm turning Japanese I really think so..."). Michael Phelps, take note.

• Finally, the moment of truth. France versus America in the 400-meter freestyle relay. Okay, Frogs, let's see what you've got.

The first leg, Phelps eeks out a slight lead. Yeah, suck our wake, Frenchie!

But then, the second leg is close, and in the third leg... NO! France goes ahead! Sacre bleu! Am I going to have to apologize to the French?

Final leg. Speedster and smack-talker Alain Bernard has an entire-body-length lead on America Jason Lezak, who's the oldest man on the U.S. swim team. Halfway through, and he's not even making a dent in Bernard's lead. No! I refuse to believe we will lose to the French!

The last flip turn. Lezak makes his move. He's gaining! OH! HE'S GAINING ON BERNARD! HE'S GOING TO MAKE IT! AAAAA! HE'S NOT GOING TO MAKE IT! AAAAA! ONLY FIVE METERS TO GO AND...

Excuse me while I have a heart attack.

LEZAK WINS! THE U.S. WINS! MICHAEL PHELPS SCREAMS AND LOOKS SCARY! EVERYONE IN OUR ROOM WATCHING THE TELEVISION SCREAMS! AAAAAA!!!

The margin of victory? Eight hundreths of a second. Two television frames. Imagine the heartbreak of training for years only to lose a race you had been leading by a mere two television frames. As sour as the Hoff loss was, this was four times as sweet.

• Bob then interviews Cris Collingsworth who says... meh. Who cares what Cris Collingsworth says? I don't pay attention to him during football season, and that's a sport he supposedly knows something about. Move along.

• So, does Michael Phelps sing this time? Nope. Neither do any of his teammates. His mom sings on camera, though, so I guess that's an improvement.

Wow. What a night! I know there was more fluff tonight, so I'm glad I didn't have to count it, as that would have just made me disappointed. But the competition itself was outstanding. I can hardly wait until tomorrow! See you then!

 

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