That's sure to produce some odd search engine results, isn't
it? But what else can I say? It's what happened...
• It's raining in Beijing, and Bob says because of
that they might not be able to bring us BMX racing or beach
volleyball. Well, maybe now NBC can show us some taekwondo,
because that's indoors and can't get rained out, right? Riiiiight.
Here's betting that if we need to fill time, it will be with
Platform diving is back, and so is the drop cam! I looooove
the drop cam. Of course, I love pretty much everything about
the swimming and diving coverage, and have said as much for
days. I guess I don't need to say any more about it.
Some fluffette about how scary it is to jump off of the 10
meter platform. Americans Laura Wilkinson and David Boudia
both think it's scary. Yet still they do it. Maybe it's only
scary when it's in slow-motion and has spooky music behind
• Chevy Gold Medal Spotlight. U.S. diver Laura Wilkinson
broke her foot before the Olympic trials in Sydney, but still
managed to win gold. Now she's going to be the old veteran
diving against girls half
her age. Go, old people!
Alex Croak of Australia was a gymnast in the Sydney Olympics,
got bored and switched to diving, making her a two sport
Olympian. We find all of this out while she's preparing to
dive. Why can't all of the divers have their trivia delivered
like this? Laura Wilkinson's fluff took three minutes and
added nothing to the show. Alex Croak's bio was more like
what you'd see on a baseball game during an at-bat. It felt
much more natural.
Bob tells us that the LIVE BMX semifinals and finals have
been postponed due to rain. Yes! Now we're going to see some
different sports, right? HA HA HA HA HA!
• Off to last
night's track and field, where we first start with that tracking
shot over the top of the stadium. Why
am I obsessed with this shot? First, because it's
cool. Second, I didn't figure out until tonight how they
were doing it. Earlier in the broadcast that camera panned
around and it turns out that it IS on a cable not, as
I thought yesterday, on a helicopter. It just turns out
that the cables run between the Bird's Nest and the Water
Cube. That's how
it got yesterday's shot from outside of the stadium. That's
your camera geekery for the day.
Now on the track, the men's 110m hurdles semifinal. Cuba's
Dayron Robles is skinny and wears glasses. He looks sort
of like Urkel. Maybe if he wins he'll do The
He wins the heat and advances to the final.
• "Crusoe," this fall on NBC. Anyone else
think that NBC executives told someone, "Hey, that 'Lost'
thing is a hit... can we do something on an island?"
Oh no. No no no no no. It's the Gymnastics Gala. Is it an
event? No. And you know what that means... all of this is
fluff. Yes, I know the Beijing Olympic Committee is selling
tickets to it, making it officially a part of the Olympics,
but I don't care. All it really does is take away time from
other events that we could be watching like, say, taekwondo,
for instance. Have I mentioned that NBC couldn't find time
in its 1,200 hours of programming to show ANY taekwondo?
Well, at least we got to see Chinese gymnast Yang Wei pretend
like the pommel horse was an actual horse. Even Al and
Tim have a hard time faking a laugh for that one. Blech.
You know how NBC has been telling us in promo after promo
that they have the Super Bowl this year? Well, I can't wait
until right after the Super Bowl, when they have the Super
Bowl Gala, featuring players from each team just goofing
around, not caring if they drop the ball or miss a block.
Won't that be great?
Carl Lewis fluff! I mean, Usain Bolt fluff, but he'd be the
first person to win the 100m and 200m in the same Olympics
since Carl Lewis in 1984. Wow. Was that really 24 years ago?
I'm old. Sooooo old.
Ato Boldon wants Bolt to break the 200m world record. Or
at least he wants Bolt to try this time, and not let up like
he did in the 100m dash earlier.
Holy Michael Johnson! Usain
Bolt is a freak! And I mean that in a good way. He destroys
the field in the 200m and beats
Johnson's world record by two hundreths of a second. Ato
has nothing to complain about this time as Bolt ran all-out
the entire race.
Michael Johnson incidentally, is here to
call the race for the BBC and NBC had a camera on him when
Bolt broke his record.
I'm guessing that since he was laughing that he took it
Wait a minute! As third
place finisher Wallace Spearmon is walking around with
an American flag on his back, officials
review the tape and find out he stepped on the inside lane
line, which means he's disqualified. Ato takes us to the
replay and shows us three instances of Spearmon stepping
on the line. Spearmon's DQ moves Shawn Crawford up to third.
wait another minute! Now Ato shows us that not only did
Spearmon step on the line, but so did Churandy Martina of
the Netherlands Antilles! If HE gets DQed, too, then Walter
Dix would move up to bronze and Shawn would move up to silver.
at the track!
Next, the women's 400m hurdles. Jamaica wins gold in another
race, as Melaine Walker finishes easily ahead of American
Sheena Tosta. What is in the Jamaican water this year?
After a few hours in real time, but just minutes in our tape-delayed
time, the U.S. protest has been upheld, Churandy Martina
has been disqualified and Walter Dix, who originally finished
fifth, will now be awarded the bronze medal. Can you imagine
how crazy all of this would have gotten if Bolt had stepped
on the line? Why, even Bela Karolyi would be going nuts!
Back in the studio, Bob tells us that Bolt's dad says that
Usain's secret was eating yams grown on their farm. Yams?
What kind of Jamaican water are they using in those yams?
A LIVE look in at beach volleyball and it's pouring! Will
it still go on? Who knows? Hey, maybe they can show taekwondo
if... oh, why do I even bother.
know that if NBC needs to fill time we're just going to get
more gymnastics gala. Ugh.
So if you're an NBC executive, what could be better for ratings
than Misti May-Treanor and Kerri Walsh playing beach volleyball
in bikinis? How about both of them playing in WET bikinis
in a rainstorm? That sounds like a Spike TV show. "Tonight
on Spike TV: Wet Bikini Volleyball!"
And now we're bouncing between two live sports, beach volleyball
and women's diving. We flash quickly over to diving to see
Laura Wilkinson's dive that puts her in the top ten.
to volleyball. It's the U.S.A. versus China, by the way.
The winner of this one gets the gold medal. A random
observation: the Chinese uniforms are red with yellow trim.
And what's the most prominent yellow item on their uniform?
It's not the Chinese flag, instead it's a big, yellow Nike
swoosh. Yay, capitalism!
• The U.S. wins the first
set 21-18, and we don't go to commercial. Why, it's like
we're there! Awesome!
A medical time out in
set two. May and Walsh are ahead 17-15. Chris Marlowe says
that Chinese player Tian is known to fake
injuries to get more time to rest. Interesting.
comment: Everyone in the audience is wearing various pastel
shades of those cheap plastic rain parkas.
I think it looks pretty.
Back to action, STILL with no
commercial breaks! I LOVE live events! It's now been 50
minutes since the last commercial
Gooooooooooooooold!!! May and Walsh give the U.S. the
win! Wow, what a great segment. You know, that almost makes
for NBC not showing any taekwondo. Okay, it doesn't really,
but the volleyball was still great.
Back to diving, STILL without a break. Laura Wilkinson qualified
for the platform diving finals, and we see her last dive
and a short interview with Andrea Kremer.
the other American diver, just missed advancing and
the 15-year-old comes to the realization that her Olympics
are done right in the middle of Andrea's interview. Kremer
does a good job here of not pushing Haley for answers. Ishimatsu
is obviously heartbroken, but she did finish 14th and only
needed to finish 12th to make the Olympic finals. My guess
is we'll see her in London in 2012.
Back to beach volleyball, where victorious Misti May-Treanor
scatters her mom's ashes on the sand, a ritual she also performed
in Athens. The guy next to her when she does it has a confused
how he'd feel if he knew those were human remains.
after one hour and one minute, we take a commercial break.
Cris Collinsworth, America's favorite soccer dad, tells us
today of South Africa's Natalie Du Toit, an amputee who competed
in the new open water swimming event. She finished 16th.
Cris is very inspired. I'm presuming it's because of the
amputee thing and not because she finished 16th. Regardless,
this is the closest yet that Cris has come to telling us
how to feel. That's not a good sign, Collinsworth. Don't
make me go all Jimmy Roberts on you.
• German Matthias Steiner, a heavyweight weightlifter,
gets some fluff. I know what you're thinking, how do heavyweight
weightlifting and fluff go together? Well, Steiner's wife
died in a car accident last year, and as he stood on the
medal stand he held up a picture of her. Yes, it was touching.
But yes, it was also fluff.
I was really, really scared that we were going to end the
night with an hour of fluff due to the Gymnastics Gala. Instead
we ended with an uninterrupted hour of beach volleyball.
This is what we call a win-win situation. See you tomorrow!